“I wish I could live more relaxed…”
This is a common concern for all HSPs.
But if you are an HSP, there is one thing to remember: the pain of being an HSP will eventually go away.
I Am Also a Highly-Sensitive-Person
HSP stands for the following words
Highly Sensitive Person
This means a person who is highly sensitive and has a high ability to “feel” things.
And I am an HSP.
I started studying psychology when I was young, mainly because I was an HSP.
As a child, I felt that the emotions of those around me were like arrows flying toward me.
I could understand the messages tied to those arrows and the feelings of the people who shot the arrows at me.
And usually, I was hurt.
This “knowing too much” was hard for me, and I wanted to solve this problem, so I majored in psychology in college.
However, all teachers at the university were insensitive (from my level), and the psychology they taught me was not very useful.
I wasn’t the only Highly Sensitive Person!
The term HSP did not exist when I was a child.
Or rather, there was not even such a concept.
But it spread rapidly after Dr. Elaine Aron wrote her book on HSP in 1996.
(Of course, similar studies had been done before that)
Until then, HSPs would have thought:
“I seem to be a little different from other people.”
“Perhaps I am weak particularly.”
“I don’t want others to know how weak I am.”
However, such people came out of their hiding places one after another, and they could proudly say, “I am an HSP, too.
It is now said that 20% of human beings are HSPs.
Many HSPs have come to know that they are also ordinally people. And they can finally live their lives with peace of mind.
（I am one of them.)
These are indeed good times.
I want to thank Dr. Elaine Aron for publishing this concept in a book for the general public.
I think we live in good times.
HSPs Are Not Good at Battling With Others
Maybe HSPs are not good at battling with others.
(This is my personal opinion.)
They may not be especially good at sudden fights and quarrels.
For example, imagine the following situation.
You are walking down the street and bump into someone.
The other person complains to you.
You know it is the other person’s fault for unexpectedly turning around and bumping into you.
But if you are an HSP, you may not be able to say anything at once in such a case.
This is because your mind is confused by the physical impact of the bump.
So your thinking does not work well.
Also, you have a valid point, and you know that if you say it, the other party will not be able to say it back.
But if you tell them that, you will corner them…
You feel sorry for them.
So you can’t say anything.
Besides, HSP has another big problem.
When something happens, their minds are flooded with thoughts.
Their brain cannot process all these thoughts at once and freezes.
Seeing HSPs freeze up like this, people around them often have a big misunderstanding about them and think:
“Why does this person remain silent?”
“Is this person insensitive?”
“This person is always in a daze…”
In other words, contrary to HSPs, they are often thought to be “Highly Insensitive Persons.”
Of course, this is a big misunderstanding.
HSPs are highly sensitive and receive a lot of information at once and send it to the brain.
As a result, their brains fail to process the information, and they freeze.
Accepting Yourself as an HSP
Being an HSP is not a disease, so there is no cure.
Being an HSP is your very personality.
Therefore, you cannot change who you are as an HSP.
(And there is no need to change it.)
So, do HSPs have to live in pain for the rest of their lives?
I answer “No” from my own experience.
However, this does not mean you will become a different person from HSP.
It does not mean you will become a different person from HSP, but you will be able to give up your vain efforts to change yourself.
Only then can you accept yourself as an HSP.
I never understood this feeling when I was young.
I could not even imagine it.
But now I understand the importance of “giving up.
In Buddhism, “giving up” means the same thing as “realizing the truth.”
In life, we need to keep giving up many things.
Many people think pessimistically about giving up.
However, “giving up” is the biggest secret to optimism in life.
And when I accepted myself as an HSP, surprisingly, the suffering caused by my high sensitivity was reduced by half.
This was probably difficult for me when I was younger.
But I think everyone can do it at a certain age.